Now What?

You have certainly heard me complain pretty much with every single post I publish, but hey you are still following my blog, so the joke is on you. I have reached the 31 marker this year, and boy did it hit me like a tonne of bricks.

Older people will tell you;

‘You are still young, this is the best time of your life and blablabla’.

To which I generally retort with;

‘Go fuck your self Susan, you and your fucking Nissan Qashqai’.

The thing is, that at this point in my life I feel like EVERYthing has changed for good. I do not nor crave to party anymore, the free time I have I spend it by doing housework, and my priorities have been turned upside down. Any new parent out there can empathise with this feeling, those who can’t are in fucking denial.

You are forced into acting mature, your life goals and achievements are shoved at the back of the broom closet, and instead of looking at a 67 Mustang 289er, your are looking at a family sized car with heated seats to compensate for your post-mexican cousine farts.

The moment of sudden realisation came to me in Valletta around a week ago. I was having some breakfast at a cafe with my kid, and overheard some teens talking the weirdest slang ever. It was so confusing and I felt so out of touch. I thought I still had it. But I clearly don’t.

Like grandpa Simspon once said;

“I used to be with it, but then they changed what ‘it’ was, and now what I’m with isn’t it. And what’s ‘it’ seems weird and scary to me.”

I remember just 10 years ago I used to work simply to enjoy the fuck out of life. Take sick leave and get blasted at a pub. Go out to Paceville, pass out, and wake up in Rabat, Gozo. Now I’m juggling three jobs to make ends meet, save money for a rainy day (what ever the fuck that means), and ALWAYS prefer a night in with one hand down my pants, a Snickers bar laying on my chest, an Irish ale in the other hand, and Daredevil running on TV.

How the fuck did  I come to this. What happened? 

The thing is, when you are an average person, with an average job, earning an average wage in such a competitive environment, you tend to loose grip on life and loose yourself trying to make ends meet, giving your kids a good life, and save money for something society wants you to buy. And at the end of the day you are too exhausted to enjoy the shit you buy and couldn’t give two fucks about it.

The moral of the story is, enjoy it while you are still in your twenties with no fucks to give, because EVERYTHING will fucking change, time will fly more rapidly, and it will hit you like a bag of fucking dicks.